I love LOVE self-help books. One of my favorite authors is Gretchen Rubin who writes about happiness and being true to yourself. Her two most recent books, Better Than Before and The Four Tendencies are about changing your habits based on your personality type.
She says that people can be categorized based on how they respond to expectations- whether they're outer or inner expectations. These are the four tendencies she says we all fall into:
- Upholder: one who responds readily to both inner and outer expectations. This person can easily do things that benefit her, like exercising every day, getting enough sleep, because these things are important to her.
- Obliger: an obliger requires external accountability. She needs a coach, a dietitian- someone she can't let down to achieve her goals at work & in her personal life.
- Rebel: a rebel rejects all expectations- both external AND internal.
- Questioner: one who questions all expectations. Someone who needs more and more data in order to make decisions.
I am an obliger, no questions asked. It's frustrating, because I wish I could just do things on my own. But what is amazing is that now that I know this about myself, I can put things in place to create external accountability in my environment - and really try to live to my full potential.
Let me know what you think! I truly love talking about this stuff - would love to discuss!